Rainbows

This is a heated topic - especially in the Methodist Church. The reason why I love Methodists is that we all have different opinions! The reason I get frustrated with Methodists is that we all have different opinions. It's not like I pretend that my opinion is the right one. I have to say I believe I'm fairly middle of the road thinking - which is a blessing and a curse because I feel that I see both sides of the issues too well, and it often makes it hard for myself to formulate my own feelings on certain issues.  However, this is an issue I do feel strong about - and I am often quiet about because too many of my friends and family are on the other side of the fence.  I want to be silent no more - I'm trying.

The supreme court voted that DOMA and Prop 8 are unconstitutional! FINALLY!! It was a close one - like in our own Methodist guidelines - the fight for full inclusion is still a close one. I know the scriptures that many try to throw at you to show that God was against anything besides heterosexual unions - and I'm sorry, if you look at the context of those scriptures, in my eyes and interpretations, they do not add up. When it comes to true love - gay or straight - Love is Love and God is for ALL love! When it comes to all people - whether you are of a different race, ethnic background, sexual orientation or anything else - Jesus loves you!

OK - side note here - do you know how hard it is for me to admit myself that Jesus loves me?! And for me to say it to you, that is even harder. I don't go for that whole "sin" thing.... I hate the word "sin" - I hate the context it is used in. I hate that it is so used that we all feel unworthy. I hate that I am quiet about my beliefs - that while I feel this close and personal relationship with God and Jesus, I still don't feel fully comfortable talking about it, talking about sin, accepting that the real definition of sin is not doing something BAD but simply missing the mark. That God is not disappointed in me.

So, that being said - God loves you. Jesus loves you. You are not a disappointment! If you love differently, it's OK. Guess what... if you disagree with me - it's still OK. God loves you! If I can change your mind - I will try. But I do not condemn you for having a different view from me. Please don't use your view to hate. And thank God for open-mindedness.

Reflections Day #3 - Annual Church Conference Session 2013

I should  have mentioned that Day 2's reflection really had a little bit of Day 3 in there. See, you break up into legislative sections on Day 2, and discuss everything in your section and vote on your section's items - but all the other stuff about voting on the consent calendar and the other items you don't even do or hear about until Day 3. For me, Day 3 was my last day - I didn't get to go to Saturday's events.

Also, in all my excitement over the legislative items, I neglected to reflect on the best part of Day 2 - the fixing of appointments!

Did you know that your pastor is only appointed for one year?  They have to be re-appointed every year that they are here! Of course this isn't the olden days - and pastors now know ahead of time if they are being moved to another church - but the official fixing of appointments is still awesome.

Each districts is called at different times, and the Great-Northern District is 2nd for the Thursday morning.  I have to say, I feel a bit of a traitor on this day - I walk in with Bethany and Jason - who will be interns at Arcata next year - and we sit next to the Arcata UMC group - Steve and Hillarie come in later and there is no room - they sit behind. I must say, I'm very excited for Jason and Bethany - maybe a little over enthusiastic about the whole situation, but I really like them. Anyways, This is Jason and Bethany's first conference - everything is new and they don't know what to expect. Names of churches are called along with those who are appointed - As the names of the appointed are called, they stand. Yes, when Arcata UMC is called, Cindy is appointed, and then Jason and Bethany appointed next. (I realize now I write all this assuming that 99% of those reading this know exactly who I am talking about).  After everyone in the district is called, the rest of the group lays hands upon these appointed - I was there to do this for Jason and Bethany and I felt so moved by the whole situation. This is a new step for them and a new step for Arcata UMC - and though I was there to represent the Church of the Joyful Healer - I felt a part of Arcata UMC at that moment in time. It was AWESOME.

So, on with Day 3 - there are other Fixing of appointments that happen - and many awards. Two members of Eureka 1st UMC, Ken and Paula Blackshear, got the Bishop's Award this year! The Bishop's Award is always inspiring - there are so many people in the United Methodist Church doing amazing things - for other people!

Day 3 is such a hodge podge of stuff, and there is ample time to go look at things upstairs. Upstairs is Cokesbury Book Store  and the Mission Handcrafts... there are booths about many of the different groups within the conference or other groups that are supported in and through the United Methodist Church.  If you go when everyone else is listening to a boring speech (yes, there are a few of these) - you can peruse the area with very little congestion. I got a few fun things for the boys through Mission Handcrafts - got myself a couple of fun books that I hope to use in JoyWorks (the parables of Dr. Seuss! you know you want to borrow it!).

Kids at Conference - I have to explain this before I go on to the next cool thing that happened on Day 3. There is a glorified childcare at conference called "Kids at Conference" - my kids loved it. As a parent and former childcare worker, of course I'm a little critical of programs like this and I know that there are things they could have done better (one thing was to not have so much down time that kids bring their DS with them and do that for hours! - OK, I could have said no, but when there isn't anything else for them to do, and the other 5 boys have their DS, I suppose at least they are playing together, in a way, sort of....) But, in general, I was pleased with the program. The boys went swimming a lot, went to the Indian Museum in Sacramento, A movie ... they had fun, so that is truly all that matters. At the end, they have all the kids who were a part of "Kids at Conference" come up on stage during the special offering time - they present the offering to the Bishop. The offering this year was Bridge of Love to Angola - to re-build a medical clinic in a place called Bom Jesus in Angola. It was touching - it was moving (I want to go do a mission in Africa now! Actually, I've wanted to for a while - too bad I don't have the money to do so, and well, I suppose I'm a little scared - ok, I've gotten you distracted). They sang a song from Angola (did you know the common vernacular in Angola is Portuguese? It was very cool.

After the presentation - we pick up our kids to go to the District Dinners. Funny thing happened at this time - we are on our way down the escalators and I see Rod! I tell the kids "Say hi to Pastor Rod!" - Quinn then says "That's Pastor Rod??!!" - at the District Dinner Rod comes to say hi - and Quinn tells him he's gotten old... ah... children, they don't hold anything back.

District dinner is a time where just the people of our district get together. It's kind of fun - Cindy had a game going on during the dinner. I was so involved in getting the kids' food that I didn't participate in it - it's OK, I helped her make up the game. The food was, well.... OK. Not enough. They should ALWAYS plan for more, just in case! Anyways, the boys saw a friend from earlier - they started playing some DS together after we ate (OK, the DS isn't all that bad.... kids really do interact with it - just a lot of screen time). I love district dinner - but we had to leave early. Kids were melting down. It had been a long week.

Back to Steve's house for a tiny bit of swimming - then bed. The adults stayed up late for one more night of fabulous conversation. Getting to know Jason and Bethany was great, and I feel even closer to Hillarie and Steve and Karla! Next year conference is in Burlingame in San Mateo County . It won't be the same, but it'll still be great. There are some boring and negative sides to conference, but on a scale from 1-10, I give conference an 8, and I really do enjoy it!

Annual Conference Session - Day #2 Reflections

Ah... day 2 - legislative time. This is the time in conference where we all get to hear and vote on resolutions - typically these are tied to some sort of social policy - but not always. The resolutions are broken up into groups of 4-5, and then the lay members and clergy who have  voice and vote are split up somewhat randomly into these groups. As smaller bodies, we discuss and vote on these resolutions - sometimes adding amendments, etc. If, when we vote, it passes with 85%, then it automatically goes on the consent calendar - meaning that the resolution does NOT get discussed on the conference floor later. These resolutions can be taken off the consent calendar later - but you must get 10 signatures of people who feel they would also like to discuss it to do so. Those resolutions that do not pass with 85% do NOT go on the consent calendar and are then discussed on the floor later. It's all very political, and mostly interesting. Though I get frustrated when people don't seem to listen to all that is going on - repeating themselves often, or not understanding the words that are spoken when someone suggests something - I enjoy this part of conference.

First I'll talk about the resolutions that were in my section - most passed to the consent calendar.

Item 7 - basically had to do with full inclusion. The original Item 7 was actually out of order with the book of discipline, and they had to re-write this in order to be "in order" and able to be discussed.  This item asks for the CA-NV Conference to provide financial reports on funds that have been used for disciplinary actions towards clergy who provide services to LGBTQ people as they would to non LGBTQ people. (for those of you who don't know, LGBTQ refers to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning) A few amendments later, and this still does not pass by 85%  and goes to the floor to be discussed (incidentally, this does end up passing on the floor)

Item 8 - This item asks churches to use union workers whenever they contract work. It was amended to say encouraged (instead of a feeling of requirement) and also added a little item to say that this would not be to the exclusion of local businesses... a lot of discussion happened trying to define the word local. It did not pass with 85% - went to the floor and did pass - so basically, whenever possible, we are encouraged to use union businesses verses non-union businesses, but local businesses are A-OK too!

Item 10 - this one felt kind of unnecessary, but now that I think about it, it kind of was. This item encourages people to visit other places of worship at least 2 times a year. Whenever we go out of town, I'm sure many of you visit other places of worship, but have you thought about doing it while you are in town? What about visiting other religious places? Have you been going to your church so long you have forgotten what it was like to be a newbie? This item encourages us ALL to do this! I think about what we are doing with Arcata UMC and Catalyst - perhaps you would like to go to church there on any given Sunday.  Bring back to your church leaders what you felt, what you learned, etc. This item passed with flying colors!

Item 11 - This item was simply to dedicate a Sunday in November to be a Filipino Ministry Sunday - where there will be celebration materials available to honor and celebrate this growing community in North America. This one passed as well with flying colors!

Item 24  - Currently there is a young adult delegate that is separate from our lay members sent to annual conference. These young adults are given voice and vote. A definition of Young Adult in the CA-NV conference is anyone between the ages of 18-35 (this is when I realized I'm still considered a young adult even though I feel so old).  Currently there is only 2 allowed from each district - but this item was to increase that to 3 - which would cause no financial burden. We actually thought it should be higher, so we increased it to 4, and it passed unanimously in section!

Item 25 - was simply a reinstating of a few rules so that certain committees could keep working. These rules were suspended 2 years ago at conference, but they found that without them, certain committees had to be suspended as well. The rules are out dated and need to be revised, but by reinstating the rules, they could continue to work. Of course this passed as well.

Now, a few other items that you may be interested in - because I left early, I am sorry to say I don't know fully all that passed or did not pass, but you may be interested in these still.

Item 2 - This item has to do with our apportionment's - which is the money that we give to the conference from our church to be distributed as needed. Basically, you give an offering to the Joyful Healer - and the Joyful Healer distributes it as needed - and the Joyful Healer basically gives an offering to the conference in the form of "apportionment's". There is a big huge formula on how these are calculated, and it's often confusing. This item was to throw that formula out the window, and replace it with a simple tithe - 10% of income (not pass through funds, but income) to be given as apportionment's to the conference. It was hotly debated both in section and on the floor - but eventually passed.

Item 13 - this was the gun control resolution.  The great thing about Methodists is that we have tons of different ideas on so many issues. In section - this did not pass, so it was brought to the floor - but during floor discussion, it was thought this would be a heated topic. Instead, it wasn't, and passed. This item encourages churches, clergy and lay members to ask for gun reform - specifically in banning of assault weapons, large capacity ammunition magazines and quick load detachable magazines, as well as other aspects of state and federal gun control legislation.

So... there you have it. The major business end of conference - and it almost always is on day 2! We went back to Steve and Karla's house with our gaggle of kids and adults - swam in the pool, put our feet up, had a little communion, and chatted. It was a long and eventful day. We were ready to go back again on Friday!

Annual Conference Session of the CA-NV Conference of the United Methodist Church- Day 1

After a long drive from Humboldt County to Sacramento - taking about 6 1/2 hours instead of 5 hours 25 min, as stated on Google maps, due to driving 4 children and road construction - we all got to conference in perfect timing to drop off the kids at the child care. Rushing into the conference floor, I get to my seat in time to hear the Laity session. For those of you who don't know, the Laity is the body of the church - truly, the Laity IS the church.  If the Pastor is the shepherd, we are the sheep.

So, I suppose I should take time right now to state what our "theme" of conference is this year.

See what you have

See your neighbors too

So, it seems that really, the underlying theme is relationships. Relationships drives us all.

During our Laity session, we had the main guest speaker, Dr. Eric Law, talk to us about the 6 holy currencies - he spoke earlier in the morning, however I was not around yet. So here are some notes and insights that I gleaned from Dr. Law during his workshop session.

In the United Methodist Church, we have appointed "Lay Leaders" - do you know who your lay leaders are? At the Church of the Joyful Healer they are Mary Meyer, Hillarie Beyer and Chris Lehman. but there are more leaders in the church then the Lay Leaders. Everyone has the power to lead. As a Lay Member to Annual Conference, I too am a leader - but I'm also a leader through the activities I do at church. What is a sustainable leader? One who participates, shows something new (new ideas), uses music, helps others, and the list can go on and on.

So now, lets get into the nitty gritty about relationships. We have all heard about "Six degrees of separation" right? Well, there is also a concept called 3 degrees of influence. That means that if you do something, your friend is more likely to do that thing... as well as their friend, and their friends friend.  So, think about it in the context of a congregation. If we had 100 people in our congregation (by the way, our number is more like 200 - so just double these numbers!) and each person has 10 friends - that is 1000 people who are influenced! What if each of those people had 10 friends?? That's 10,000 people! And then 10 friends for each of them - 100,000 people! Oh my goodness! We have incredible influence in what we do with those around us. Think of it for just one person - my example will be myself. If I have 10 friends who have 10 friends who have 10 friends, I'm influencing 1000 people with one action! That is pretty powerful!

Lets talk now about a couple of ideas about congregational relationships.  What if you have a congregation that is pretty tight loving - they take care of each other, they love each other - gee, that would be pretty awesome - for that congregational community. But what about a newcomer? How do they really get in? And then the opposite - a community that is so focused on community outreach - a new come comes in and they are welcomed... woo hoo. But what about if that person is truly in need - where are they going to rest? How are they gong to be nurtured? So of course, the best outcome is a little of both. A tight loving community that is also focused on Outreach - seems like we are talking about what I see at the Joyful Healer. :)

Talking more about relationships - we all know that it is so easy to relate well to those who are like us! It's a fact - if there is someone out there who likes music, works with children (or has children - especially boys close to my own sons age), who is close to my own age and who has similar thoughts as me (religiously, politically, etc) it is going to be a lot easier for me to relate to them. On the opposite end of the spectrum, it is harder for me to relate to someone who is older, maybe no children or someone who has different views on life than I do.

So I want to talk now about cultural make up, because this has so much to do with relationships.  We are all made up of many different cultural components. Culture is not just your race, your ethnicity. In a Social Work class at HSU that I took about 9 years ago, I learned that we not only have the culture we most identify with, but we also have a family culture as well. Here are some ideas of components of culture - but realize the list could go on!

age, gender, physical ability, mental ability, skin color, racial background, ethnic heritage, sexual orientation, marital status, geographical location, migration history, military experience, education, religion, profession, economic status, adoption, nationality, medical condition, theology, language

As we relate to those who are not much like us, we go through a process of adjustment. I wish I could draw the graphic we saw, but I'll do the best I can with what I got.

Expectations (we expect others to be like us, but they aren't) -------> this causes a reaction (anger, fear, confusion) - We can choose to react two ways - the first is to react negatively and withdraw (argue, attack, judge).  The second way is to become aware of our reactions (we react, there is nothing you can really do about a reaction, but you can be aware of the reaction ---> and as we are aware, our reaction subsides, we get more information and understand the culture of someone else. 

This is where day one ends... This day made me uncomfortable - and yet I loved it.  I know that there are many reactions I could take better care to be aware of in myself.