"To serve is beautiful, but only if it is done with joy and a whole heart and a free mind"
Pearl S. Buck (1892-1973) American novelist
I have been thinking a lot about service. When one decides to become a member of the Methodist church, they pledge to be faithful to God through Prayers, Presences, Gifts and Service (and Witness is in there somewhere too).
I often have to look for volunteers for things - it's hard, and exhausting. I feel often that I am asking the same people, because I somehow know I'll get them to help one way or the other. If I put out an open-ended invitation to volunteer in service, I usually get no one. I take on a lot of service myself, sometimes because I truly want to - but most times because I feel like "If not me, then who?"
And then I saw the above quote, and it got me thinking about why people do, or don't, volunteer. Service should NOT be a chore. When it starts feeling like a chore, you have probably reached burn out. Sometimes, those of us who volunteer can become resentful of those who do not - I am so very guilty of this. Sometimes I have a running dialog in my head - "Why doesn't Jane Doe ever volunteer?" or "Why does Jon Doe say that he wants to volunteer, but when volunteers are asked for, he never steps up?" I find that I have to remind myself about why we feel motivated to volunteer - remember that payoff I spoke of in a different post. Service should be done with Joy - if you don't have the payoff of Joy, then why are you serving? Service should be done with the whole heart - if you are only serving because you feel you should - that your heart is not fully into your service - why are you serving? Service should be done with a free mind - free will, we do service because we WANT to, not because we HAVE to, not because it is a chore for us.
I was not raised with these ideas. I remember often hearing that exasperated tone in my parents' voice when there was a "Trustee Work Day" at church -- "Why do we HAVE to go mom? I don't want to clean up the church." -- "Because that is what you do when you are part of the church. you don't have to like it, but you HAVE to serve. If you didn't serve, then nothing would get done, the church would fall apart. It is up to everyone to do their part - it is what you need to do as a member of the church." I'm sure that most parents force their children to do service now and again, because otherwise, how will children even learn to experience service. But I could always tell that my parents felt this way themselves -- they didn't necessarily want to do the service either - but they felt guilty if they didn't help out in some way, and they felt it was their job, their duty, as members of the church. There was never any joy in serving. Our heart wasn't really in it, and with a free mind? yeah, right!
I think that my upbringing in service has tainted the way I see service. I find myself criticizing those who do not serve. I find myself wanting to make them feel guilty so that they WILL serve. But... wouldn't it be better to find a way into their heart so that they will serve with joy, instead of requiring service and having malice in their heart the entire time they are serving?
I wish I knew what that magic element was to encourage service in others. I could REALLY use some Sunday School teachers - but... I come up against a couple of brick walls - Some are totally afraid to help - feeling like they don't know how to work with children. Others are parents who just want a break (I totally understand - I'm a parent too). I don't want to guilt people into doing something like this -- "If we don't have anyone who volunteers, we won't have ANY Sunday School." -- the children will ultimately be the ones who suffer from this if their teachers are not fully into their service with joy and free will.
So, I'm still struggling. I understand that some people are just not there - spiritually. They don't feel led to be in service, or of service, in a particular area, such as Sunday School. Some people are felt to lead in other areas of the church - they are already helping joyfully. Some people have served so much in their life that they are tired - they are burnt out. They no longer feel joy when they serve. We are all in a different spot. I think I'm in the middle of serving Joyfully and burnout. I LOVE teaching Sunday School. But some days it feels like a chore. I enjoy being a tech person and helping out with the PowerPoint presentations during worship - but I definitely could use a break there. I REALLY want to help out with service out in the community - like our monthly Joyful Hammer work day at Patrick's Point State Park -- but I don't have the time.
I just want to leave you with something that happened to our own family just a few weeks ago. I have probably gone a little far the other way, and I don't require service of my children. Sometimes they end up doing it automatically just because I am - and if they are around, I'll ask for help. They usually do it. Well, on April 13th, my son asked me if he could work with his Boy Scout troop at the Patrick's Point clean up day. I'm sure that a little peer pressure helped there, as all the other boys were going to do it. But, I asked him - "Are you sure you want to?" -- "Of course Mom" came the response! So, I hope that I can continue to find myself joyfully in service to others and of service to my church - and that my own children will learn this as well.
"The meaning of life is to find your gift - the purpose of life is to give it away!" - Unknown
May you find your gifts in service!
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